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30 August 2006 @ 08:07 pm
 
SIRIUS LORETTA BLACK.

YOU GET HERE RIGHT THIS MINUTE, D'YOU HEAR ME?

I HAVE A DISGRUNTLED BAT FLAPPING ROUND AND ROUND MY ROOM, I HAVE SPENT THE LAST WEEK STARING AT TRANSFIGURATIONS BOOKS, AND I HAVEN'T SLEPT IN 75 HOURS. WHATEVER THE HELL YOU DID, YOU'D BETTER GET HERE AND SORT IT OUT. OTHERWISE THERE WILL BE RECRIMINATION. REALLY PAINFUL.
 
 
 
Padfootistuffmypants on August 30th, 2006 07:14 pm (UTC)
... recrimeewhatnow?
Remus Jane Lupinmoopylunin on August 30th, 2006 07:15 pm (UTC)
IT MEANS I WILL TAKE THIS HERE CROWBAR AND CAUSE YOU ALL MANNER OF PAIN WITH IT.

GET THE PICTURE?
Padfootistuffmypants on August 30th, 2006 07:17 pm (UTC)
Moony- OH MY GOD REMUS PUT THAT AWAY. WHY DO YOU EVEN HAVE A CROWBAR.

AND YOU CALL YOURSELF A PREFECT.
Remus Jane Lupinmoopylunin on August 30th, 2006 07:22 pm (UTC)
I have a crowbar, my simple-minded friend, so that when I befriend seemingly hostile Slytherins who actually turn out not to be so bad after all, and you get jealous and turn them into amphibians, thus ensuring that they will hate me forever, I can seek revenge.

And actually I've decided to call myself the Black Knight. I want that on all my letterheads.
Padfoot: now you don'tistuffmypants on August 30th, 2006 07:40 pm (UTC)
But you can't be the Black Knight! I'm the Black Knight. There can't be two Black Knights.

And anyway, it's just as well. Why would you want to be friends with a newt?
Remus Jane Lupin: rar get away from my chocolatemoopylunin on August 30th, 2006 07:44 pm (UTC)
There won't be.

I don't want to be friends with a newt, Sirius. That is the entire point. So will you please reverse whatever it was you did, and then I won't have to insert anything unpleasant into any of your orifices.
Padfoot: ohgodyestrufflesistuffmypants on August 30th, 2006 07:52 pm (UTC)
I don't recall there being a crowbar in any of Mum Potter's leaflets- OW OW OW OKAY ALRIGHT ALRIGHT WOULD YOU STOP THAT ALREADY. I HAVE DELICATE SKIN.

Honestly Moony I'd always pegged you for a pacifist.
Remus Jane Lupinmoopylunin on August 30th, 2006 08:07 pm (UTC)
MAYBE I'LL RECONSIDER PACIFISM WHEN I'VE BEEN TO BED.

COME ON. TURN HIM BACK.
Padfoot: no those aren't moony's knickersistuffmypants on August 30th, 2006 08:33 pm (UTC)
MOONY ARE YOU SURE IT'S HEALTHY FOR YOUR NOSTRILS TO FLARE LIKE THAT. YOU KNOW THEY SAY THAT AFTER 72 HOURS OF NO SLEEP YOU'RE CONSIDERED CLINICALLY INSANE. CAN'T WE DISCUSS THIS IN THE MORNING? AFTER YOU'VE HAD A FEW POTS OF TEA MAYBE?

... Remus?

ohmyg- MOONY THIS ISN'T FUNNY. LOOK JUST PUT DOWN THE CROWBAR AND WE'LL TALK ABOUT THIS CALMLY AND RATIONALLY LIKE YOU ALWAYS WANT TO DO. WITH CHOCOLATE. CHOCOLATE, MOONY!
Remus Jane Lupin: real girls wear pinkmoopylunin on August 30th, 2006 08:42 pm (UTC)
CHOCOLATE. CHOCOLATE, HE SAYS. I CARE NOT FOR YOUR PIFFLING EARTHLY PLEASURES.

ALL I WANT IS SNAPE BACK SO THAT I CAN GO TO BED.

I mean- THAT CAME OUT WRONG.
Padfoot: stop staring at my crotchistuffmypants on August 30th, 2006 08:53 pm (UTC)
SO THAT'S HOW IT IS, EH? THE TRUTH COMES OUT.

WELL I'VE GOT NEWS FOR YOU REMUS JOHN JANE WHATEVER YOUR STUPID MIDDLE NAME IS LUPIN. I'M NOT SNIVELLIMISING HIM JUST SO YOU CAN TAKE HIM BACK TO THE TREEHOUSE FOR ANOTHER ROUND OF HIDE THE LEAFLET. YOU BASTARD.
Remus Jane Lupin: rar get away from my chocolatemoopylunin on August 30th, 2006 09:02 pm (UTC)
I don't-

But-

SHUT UP. I'M NOT HIDING ANYTHING WITH SNAPE. AND EVEN IF I WAS, WHAT'S IT TO YOU, HM? HMMMM??
Padfoot: istuffmypants on August 31st, 2006 06:52 pm (UTC)
FINE. FINE.

Valdereverto.

THERE. NOW YOU'RE FREE TO HAVE SEX WITH BAT BOY. GO ON, SEE IF I CARE. YOU COULD PROBABLY USE HIS HAIR SLIME FOR LUBRICANT. AND I'M SURE HE'LL JUST LOVE YOUR CROWBAR FETISH. BUT DON'T COME CRYING TO ME WHEN YOU GET ADIS OR SOMETHING. YOU KNOW WHAT THOSE RAVENCLAWS ARE LIKE.
Remus Jane Lupin: rar get away from my chocolatemoopylunin on August 31st, 2006 07:07 pm (UTC)
Sirius. Sir- don't walk away-

OH WHY ARE YOU SUCH A CUNT.